Distance Disorder

It used to be that you could hear something in passing or in deliberate conversation and be able to label such things as gossip.  You knew in your gut that the person sharing stories of jealousy, offense, or humiliation would never dare to do so in front of the one they were speaking about.  You knew in your heart that how it was being shared wasn’t an exact depiction of the real story… just their version.  You knew they were exaggerating to fit their angle, to make themselves look better.  You knew it was wrong. 

 

Then as time has crept on suddenly there were more voices with more stories to share.  The topics of conversation have elevated from playground rumors to something that happened somewhere in the world to someone we don’t even know. “News” reports, talk shows, magazine articles, internet sites, bloggers, and social media have all taken their opportunity in throwing their hats in the ring for your attention.  Throwing anyone they can under the bus of public opinion and suddenly it is ok to do so.  Suddenly we have a right to talk about it, to have an opinion, to be jealous, to be rude, to be unforgiving, to be unloving, and even to be judge and jury.  Suddenly it isn’t wrong anymore. It isn’t gossip, it is news.

 

We tend to jump on band wagons of opinions and assumptions and end up taking on feelings that were never ours to begin with.  We see a picture of a “friend” whose parents have bought her a car and we assume she is spoiled or being showy about it and suddenly we are jealous. (I use quotations because there is no real way to keep a friendship with over 1,000 people at a time… sorry social media… ain’t nobody got time for that!) Now if it were my best friend and I would know just how hard she tried to get good grades to earn that car and I would be happy for her.  But we’re not BFFs… I just follow her on Instagram and have never really had a conversation face to face.  So I am jealous.  Because I am allowed to be.

 

Or we see that one girl who has changed her relationship status a thousand times… last month… and we laugh at her.  Make jokes about how desperate she is and how she can never be alone.  She is crazy, we say.  But I could guarantee if you were to sit down with her one on one you would find a lonely, sad girl who just wants to know what it feels like to be loved.  Someone who has had her heart broken time and time again and now the shell of a girl that remains is barely strong enough to face another day, especially not one alone.  But we don’t sit down with her.  We are only Facebook friends after all.  So we laugh.  Because we are allowed to.

 

Or we read about another politician, actor or actress, singer, musician, public servant, pastor, random man or woman, who has done something terrible and we decide they are a terrible person.  How dare they make a mistake, do something wrong, or have the wrong view on something because we surely never do.  They are truly terrible.  Truly.  And I can make such a judgement because they are famous and have put themselves in that spotlight.  I can’t stand them.  Because I am allowed to.

 

Girls, can I ask you something?  Who says you are allowed to?  Who says it is right?  I was once told that I had my own “haters club”.  That girls would literally sit and talk about how much they hated my husband and I.  And they felt they were righteous in doing so because they were justified… because we deserved it.  My heart sank to my stomach when I heard about such a thing.  Not because they didn’t have reason for ill-feelings, I am fallible after all.  No, it hurt because they thought they were right in harboring such hate in their hearts.  And not only in harboring it but spreading it amongst others who didn’t even know us.  So not only are we hated by some who have never accepted our sincere apologies, but we are also hated by those who are hearing about things we have “done” years and years ago.

 

I am sure reading this you are thinking how ridiculous it would be to take part in such a club but we unknowingly do it all the time.  We talk about a singer's recent distasteful performance, the police shooting in Ferguson, or another actor in rehab as if we were allowed to have an opinion.  I am not saying we need to stick our heads in the sand and ignore what is going on in the world around us.  But I am saying we need to be better at guarding our hearts from things so far in the distance that we have no business being a part of them in the first place.  Our society is suffering from a Distance Disorder that makes it seem acceptable to form opinions of others, most of which we don’t even know.  Because they will never know.  We hide behind our phones and our computer screens, typing hateful speech that doesn’t glorify God and with that same keyboard type scriptures for our status updates.  That isn’t love my friends.  That isn’t believing the best in others.  And that isn’t what Jesus would do, because He didn’t. 

 
These stories are being told for a reason, they are someone's reality.  They are someone's struggles, someone's mistakes.  How hurtful to be talking so flippantly about the worst day of someone's life as if it were a conversation filler.  I do not think we would be so casual in our conversation if they were standing in front of us.  If they were our friend.  If we were trying to persuade them of Christ's love for them.  We all know that tomorrow will bring another victim to talk about, another person to de-humanize, another story to keep the disorder running full cycle.  But enough is enough. 
 

Can we stop attacking people, using their names as if they symbolized their sins, and start praying for them instead?  Can we learn to guard our hearts against assumptions and personal opinion?  Can we learn to view others through the eyes of God and see a soul under all that flesh?  Can we truly love our neighbor… and our enemy… like Jesus commanded us to?  Even if we don’t know them, or should I say especially if we don’t know them?  Because if Christ loved us at our darkest (Romans 5:8), shouldn’t we love others also at theirs?  I think we have suffered from this disorder for too long and it is time to take the blinders off.  Because it is not ok.  And it shouldn’t be allowed.

 

 

 

 

Luke 6:35-37

But love your enemies and be kind and do good [doing favors so that someone derives benefit from them] and lend, expecting and hoping for nothing in return but considering nothing as lost and despairing of no one; and then your recompense (your reward) will be great (rich, strong, intense, and abundant), and you will be sons of the Most High, for He is kind and charitable and good to the ungrateful and the selfish and wicked.  So be merciful (sympathetic, tender, responsive, and compassionate) even as your Father is [all these]. Judge not [neither pronouncing judgment nor subjecting to censure], and you will not be judged; do not condemn and pronounce guilty, and you will not be condemned and pronounced guilty; acquit and forgive and release (give up resentment, let it drop), and you will be acquitted and forgiven and released.

 

Proverbs 4:23

Keep and guard your heart with all vigilance and above all that you guard,

for out of it flow the springs of life.

 

 

He knows my Name

A terrible tragedy happened just down the street from where my husband and I used to live in Stockton, CA.  A bank robbery and a high speed chase that ended in three people losing their lives.  My newsfeed blew up yesterday with friends who had taken video of what was happening, posted updates on locations to stay away from, and shared news reports to give the latest details on who was involved.  I read through them all.  Searching… praying… praying that I didn’t recognize any of the names. 

 

This was my city, my community, my neighborhood.  My heart hurt for the families who had to be notified of a loved one’s death and when it was all over I was relieved.  Relieved.  Somewhere in that city there was a husband, son, family grieving because that Wednesday had easily become the worst day of their lives and I… was relieved.

 

I was notified last night by a friend in youth ministry that one of their students was the son of the hostage who had lost her life.  Immediately I began to pray for this boy who would never again get to share a hug with his mother, never get to tell her he loved her face to face, never get to fight with her over curfew, and never get to see her face as he said “I do”.  I prayed and thought about it a lot last night.  It kept me up too late and as I drug myself out of bed this morning it was the first thing on my mind.  Yesterday it was just a story that I was reading but last night it was a face, a name, a voice of someone who was living out that nightmare.  The feeling of relief had left me and was replaced by a deep sadness as I looked at my own boys and hugged them a little tighter.

 

I started my day not knowing any of the names on that report; I started that day hearing about a story.  But then God reminded me of something- that story was someone’s reality and while I don’t know their names- He does.  He knows every one of them.  He knows the very details of their lives.  He has thought of them more times than there are very pieces of sand on the shore.  They were His creation.  HE knew their names.

 

Now I am not saying that I should be guilty for my initial feeling of relief but I was made quite aware in that moment of how different “stories” and “realities” are.  Stories are distant; realities are ever present.  Stories are impersonal; realities are so painfully personally. Stories impact us for a moment; realities impact us for the rest of our lives.  We read stories, but we live realities. 

 

We read stories, but we live realities.

 

May we never forget that God is not a story, He is a reality, and He knows our names.

 

In the midst of our struggles, in the midst of our pains, He calls us by name.  He loves us.  He is for us and not against us.  He fights on our behalf.  He strengthens our weakened bodies with His power.  And He carries us through the seemingly never ending days.  

 

God is our reality, and we are His.

 

 

 

 

Psalm 139:1-18
 O Lord, you have examined my heart and know everything about me.  You know when I sit down or stand up.  You know my thoughts even when I’m far away.   You see me when I travel and when I rest at home. You know everything I do.  You know what I am going to say even before I say it, Lord.  You go before me and follow me. You place your hand of blessing on my head.  Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too great for me to understand!  I can never escape from your Spirit! I can never get away from your presence! If I go up to heaven, you are there; if I go down to the grave, you are there.  If I ride the wings of the morning, if I dwell by the farthest oceans, even there your hand will guide me, and your strength will support me.  I could ask the darkness to hide me and the light around me to become night— but even in darkness I cannot hide from you.  To you the night shines as bright as day. Darkness and light are the same to you.   You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb.  Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.  You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.  You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book.  Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed. How precious are your thoughts about me, O God. They cannot be numbered! I can’t even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand! And when I wake up, you are still with me!

 

 

 

Just Keep Swimming

On a visit with Pastor Lori, the very last one I would unknowingly ever have, I got to talk with her about this blog.  It wasn’t on my agenda of things to talk about as she lay in her bed Duck Dynasty playing quietly in the background.  In fact, at that particular moment it was one of the furthest things from my mind.  I was thankful to be having a conversation with her, cherishing every moment I had in the warmth of her own home.  My last visit was vastly different and it had left me a little shaken, but this visit- this one was different.  My prior conversation with her in the hospital was quiet and unfamiliar.  I was so caught off guard that I did what I seem to do often these days when facing unknown territory.  I wrote.  I wrote about her fight with cancer, and a few weeks after it had posted a visiting friend had read it aloud to her. 

 

Pastor Lori looked at me over dinner, our personal conversation being over for some time, and brought back up how she just loved the blog.  She loved the parallel from something she had taught me while I had lived there as a teenager to our everyday Christian walks and it was so heartwarming to hear her speak of it.  I didn’t feel that special, that important.  It felt meaningless in the grand scheme of things, but to her it was beautiful.  “You are a great writer” she told me, “you should keep writing”. 

 

There are many things Pastor Lori is but a sarcastic encourager is not one of them.  She would not be the type of friend often referred to on talent shows such as American Idol after someone truly terrible gets up to sing and says their friend thinks they are great.  Their friend told them to sing on National Television.  Their friend knows they should win.  Well, I hate to break it to you- but that person is not your friend.  They might just hate you.  Or want to humiliate you.  Either way, not your friend.  Those auditions make me cringe (and make my husband happy inside, which makes me wonder what that says of him). 

 

Pastor Lori was not one of those types.  She meant every word of it.  I was so humbled in that moment that I was unsure how to respond, so naturally I smiled and kept eating because food solves a multitude of uncertainties (kidding of course- for the most part). 

 

“You should keep writing.”

 

Last summer after she passed away I stopped.  I stopped writing because it was too hard.  I didn’t want to encourage anyone else because I was hurting and needed a friend myself.  I considered stopping altogether, walking away from the path I was once so sure of.  I could do it.  I could stop.  No one would even notice.  No one would even care.  Have I done anything that has made any kind of a difference anyway?

 

Angry.  I was so angry.

 

A month had gone by and I had posted once, and then a few more months and I had posted only a few more times.  It wasn’t something I wanted anymore, I felt like it was doing no good in the grand scheme of things.  No one would even notice if I just stopped.  And then while visiting a church very dear to my heart I had an interesting conversation with a father who had read a post after his daughter had shared it.  “Are you still writing” he asked.  I wanted to say “unfortunately, yes” but instead just said “when I can”.  He looked at me and said, “that’s great because you are really good at it.”  The words came from his mouth but I heard it in her voice.  I didn’t feel great at it.  I wasn’t even sure if I could do it anymore but for that moment I could hear her voice and I knew if she was still here she would be saying the same thing. 

 

As I sit here and write today I remind myself of her words.  I don’t always “feel” like it.  I don’t always “feel” like anything I write makes any sort of difference but even if it is for one person for one day, then it must be worth it.  That post was for her.  That post made her day in that hospital bed and that was worth the pain of writing it. 

 

All throughout scripture we find God speaking to us, reminding us to keep going.  Keep making right decisions.  Keep trusting Him.  Keep loving the sometimes unlovable.  And it sucks.  Yep, it sucks.  Because we don’t always feel like it.  We want to stop.  We want to ask what kind of a difference it is making anyway.  We wonder if anyone would even notice our not being at church.  Would they?  Would anyone even care?  I could stop, you think.  I could walk away from everything.  And the sad truth is that many have.

 

If you feel like you are fighting a losing battle then hear me out… keep going.  One more day.  One more choice to do right.  One more prayer.  One more church service.  Just one more.  Because it won’t always “feel” easy and full of rainbows and butterflies.  Sometimes (most times if we are honest with ourselves) things get hazy and hard, but we must choose to keep going.  Keep believing.  Keep trusting.  Keep loving. 

 

God somehow always sends the right people at the right time to remind us… to just keep going.  So this post is for your Pastor Lori.  I am still writing and still trusting that it is worth it... even for the one.

 

Ephesians 3:16-19

I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources He will empower you with inner strength through his Spirit. Then Christ will make His home in your hearts as you trust in Him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.

 

 

 

I have to do it myself

Standing toe to toe with anger, offense, bitterness, betrayal, hurt, pain, loss or grief is nothing uncommon.  We do it several times a month, a day even, and when we aren’t the ones facing such issues it seems as though our friends are.  Difficulty is all around us, and no one is out of its destructive reach.

 

Through the many struggles of life we are faced with a decision, a choice that can only and will only be made by none other than ourselves… a decision that will alter our present and inevitably change our futures.  The battle we are facing is ours to fight, only ours, but the outcome will affect many.  So we decide, we choose, to do battle.  We choose to put on our gloves and confront the very issue that plagues us.  No one can carry us through; we have to do it ourselves.

 

Reflecting on the past few weeks I have had with many dear friends in the midst of their own storms, I have felt a bit at a loss.  Helpless.  Like I could do nothing to fix or change their circumstances.  I want to swoop in and be the hero, make everything right again, but I can’t.  The only thing that is within my ability to do is to pray for God to intercede and then take a front row seat to their victory… and in some cases their defeat. 

 

Some people will choose unforgiveness, some people will choose hatred, some people will choose revenge, some people will choose destructive behaviors that carry them further and further into the darkest of seas… and I have a front row seat.

 

Well my friends, I can't do it anymore.  I need to do something... anything!

 

When God called Moses to lead the Israelites out of Egypt he wasn’t just asking him to lead them on a long walk.  He was asking Moses to fight against every enemy that would come against them, and there were many.  He was asking Moses to look beyond their sin, look beyond their complaining, look beyond their rebellion, and fight for them.  Fight for them because he was the only one who was promised victory.  He was the only one. 

 

In Exodus 17:8-16 we find Moses instructing Joshua to lead the army to battle as he would stand on Mt. Sinai with his arms raised.  This was how God instructed Moses that they would win; Joshua would fight and Moses would stand with his hands to the heavens.  At first glance it sounds like Moses got the better end of the staff, so to speak, but have you ever tried holding your arms up for any length of time?  I have… it was one of our punishments as kids.  We had to stand in a corner with our hands above our heads… and it stinkin’ hurts!  As long as Moses’ hands were up, they would win… but he got tired as anyone would, and his arms that once weighed only a few pounds now felt like he was carrying the literal weight of the world and as they sank lower to the ground the armies sank lower to their enemy. 

 

Only Moses’ hands would earn their victory.  Only his.  Aaron (Moses’ brother) could do no good with his arms flailing in the air begging for God to give the battle to him, it was not his battle to fight.  But reading further into scripture we find that Aaron could do something.  He could do one thing.  He could hold up the arms of Moses.  He could support him.  Because even though Moses had to do it himself, he did not have to do it alone.

 

So if you are facing a battle of your own, find a friend to help hold your arms up; someone who will support you no matter their personal opinions, someone who will challenge you to keep doing right when you get tired and weak, someone who will remind you to think and speak the Word over your situation, and someone who will stand with you believing God for your victory.

 

And if it isn’t you that is facing the storm, find a friend who is.  Be the one to decide that while you can do nothing but “be there”, that “being there” is enough.

 

Because while we have to do it ourselves, we don’t have to do it alone.

 

Philippians 1:27

Above all, you must live as citizens of heaven,
conducting yourselves in a manner worthy of the Good News about Christ.
Then, whether I come and see you again or only hear about you,
I will know that you are standing together with one spirit and one purpose,
fighting together for the faith, which is the Good News.

 

 

 

 

How did I get here?

With Father’s Day being this past weekend I was so thankful to have been in Northern California to celebrate my amazing Dad.  I can honestly say that I am who I am today because of him.  Yes, genetics plays a huge role in that, but my dad genuinely cares for people in the most sacrificial of ways and I know that I am a better youth pastor because of his example.  Being a few hours away now I wanted this day to be extra special so I tried to think of what he likes… and then it hit me; he enjoys homemade things but even more than that he loves surprises.  This of course gets a little tricky when you are trying to execute a plan while staying in his house with him around every corner.  In times like these it comes at a great benefit to be able to tell a complete believable lie… on the spot… with a straight face.  Not to say that this is a quality worth bragging about, but with all honesty I can say that I have only used my powers for good.

 

So here was the plan, we were going to surprise him at one of his favorite Mediterranean food spots and have a family dinner.  This could only be achieved with a few “stories” (because it sounds more Christ-like than lying) being told to him. 

 

Story #1- “I am baking cupcakes because someone found out I am in town and offered to pay me for them.” (When in reality they were for his special dinner)

 

Story #2- “Mom and Bethany need to run to the store to get a few more things for dinner.”

 

Story #3- “Since Mom and Beth are gone can you drive with me, Dad, so I can just run in to drop the cupcakes off without having to get Jake out of the car?” (This of course made way more believable due to the fact that Jake had been acting like his affectionate nickname- The Albino Terrorist- and my dad pitied me.)

 

Story #4- “We should stop by an ice cream shop and get a scoop while we are out… or better yet since Jake has had a ton of sugar, some hummus from Daphne’s!”

 

Story #5- “The girl is running late at her house so let’s stop for hummus first!”

 

The conclusion… My dad walking into the restaurant in a tank top (something he would never ever EVER wear to a dinner table), gazing at the menu, while all of my siblings and my mom are seated at a table complete with a fancy tablecloth and cheesy grins.  It was a glorious moment, I pulled it off.  I am the greatest liar ever!

 

Not braggingly of course.

 

And definitely not true.

 

That title, without question, is reserved for someone we all know too well.  He is the father of lies and sometimes like my dad we find ourselves stumbling into places completely unaware of the plans he has set out for us.  Have you ever had a moment of clarity and upon reflection of your life exclaimed, “how did I get here?”  How did I become this person?  How is this my life?  How have I come so far from God without even noticing?  This was never my dream, how did I get here?

 

I had a chance to meet up with a close friend of mine a few days ago and I heard those five words creep out of her mouth like a dark cloud creeps into a blue sky without warning.  It is one of the most heartbreaking things a person can hear, and even more heartbreaking to be the person saying it.  My heart was filled with sorrow and at that moment I wished more than anything that I could do something to help but I knew that all I could do was pray.  And so that’s what we did; we prayed.  And then as she left I continued to pray.  As I got halfway home I found myself still praying and even now as she crosses my mind I can’t hold back the prayers that fill my heart.  I want only the best for her and this was so far from it.  I had watched my friend so full of life and passion turn into a numb form of a woman, just trying to survive each day.  How did she get here?

 

And then I reflected on my past week staying with my parents.  Remembering the moments crying in a back room because the stress of my once do-no-wrong miracle baby had turned into a holy terror and all I wanted to do was sleep… for like twenty years… because I just couldn’t handle any more stress.  How did I get here?  How did I go from strong, capable, adaptable, woman to someone who hides from a two foot tall albino in a dark room?  How did I get here?

 

There are things both beyond our control and in it that have the power to guide us, and like a man without a map we find ourselves in the darkest of places that we were never intended to be.  It wasn’t God’s plan, and it surely wasn’t mine.  And while we may have not intended to be there, I can assure you my friend that someone did.  The bible says that “the devil comes to steal, kill, and destroy you” (John 10:10).  He knows exactly which doors to open, what words to speak, and who to use to lead you to your very death.  He has a plan for your life, a sometimes glamorous but never fulfilling plan; like a mirage that you chase into the depths of a desert, only to find yourself alone and exhausted.  And even worse he can tell a completely believable lie… on the spot… with a straight face.  Just ask Eve, or Judas, or Peter… or anyone else for that matter!

 

I hate that the lies are so believable at first.  A dear friend of mine has always said that “the truth is so foreign because the lies are so familiar.”  The lies that steal our dignity, our worth, our dreams, our futures; the lies that slowly creep in and guide us into the darkest of places.  It won’t be fun.  It won’t be worth it.  It will hurt.   It is a big deal.  Whatever the lie… you will regret it, and you too will find yourself in a place of torment and loneliness saying “how did I get here?”

 

And if by chance you are in that place this is my prayer for you. I pray that you would find the “abundant life” that the Lord has planned for you (the response to the devil’s plans in John 10:10).  That you would learn to lean on and trust in Him to guide you back to a place of safety and security, a place where foundations never shake even during the strongest of storms.  That come Hell or high water you will choose to do the right thing and not just the easiest. That you walk in love and forgiveness toward others and yourself.  That you never forget that dark place and keep it as a reminder for when you are tempted to believe the lies again. 

 

That you never again have reason to say… “how did I get here?”

 

 

 

Psalm 91

¹ Those who live in the shelter of the Most High
    will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
² This I declare about the Lord:
He alone is my refuge, my place of safety;
    he is my God, and I trust him.
³ For he will rescue you from every trap
    and protect you from deadly disease.
⁴ He will cover you with his feathers.
    He will shelter you with his wings.
    His faithful promises are your armor and protection.
⁵ Do not be afraid of the terrors of the night,
    nor the arrow that flies in the day.
⁶ Do not dread the disease that stalks in darkness,
    nor the disaster that strikes at midday.
⁷ Though a thousand fall at your side,
    though ten thousand are dying around you,
    these evils will not touch you.
⁸ Just open your eyes,
    and see how the wicked are punished.

⁹ If you make the Lord your refuge,
    if you make the Most High your shelter,
¹⁰ no evil will conquer you;
    no plague will come near your home.
¹¹ For he will order his angels
    to protect you wherever you go.
¹² They will hold you up with their hands
    so you won’t even hurt your foot on a stone.
¹³ You will trample upon lions and cobras;
    you will crush fierce lions and serpents under your feet!

¹⁴ The Lord says, “I will rescue those who love me.
    I will protect those who trust in my name.
¹⁵ When they call on me, I will answer;
    I will be with them in trouble.
    I will rescue and honor them.
¹⁶ I will reward them with a long life
    and give them my salvation.”

 

 

He is everywhere!

Youth camps were a big part of my teenage life.  As soon as one was over I was counting the days until the next one would happen.  When I was sixteen I had become so fond of these camps that I became a co-counselor and at 17 I was counseling on my own.  I don’t know exactly what I was thinking considering I myself was still in high school but those weeks brought some of the best memories I have as a teenager.  One of which being the traditional stop at the Pizza Factory in Marysville on the way home.  It was such a fun time to defrag from the week with other leaders, laugh at the craziness, and thank God for lives changed.  It was the only time each year that I knew we’d all have the chance to sit around a table, eat some amazing pizza, and be in awe of yet another incredible week.  God is so good.

 

As the years have come and gone we have moved a little further and a little further away from that camp up in Chico, CA but it’s memory will stay with me a lifetime.  From time to time I crave the camaraderie I found at that table, the encouragement, the laughs, the memories made, and even that delicious pizza.  Oh the pizza! If only it weren’t a five hour drive to get that little slice of heaven! 

 

After being in Visalia just a short while, my husband and I decided to explore our new city a bit and take the boys on a drive up the mountain to the Sequoia National Forest. (Granite we had only made it to the gate before realizing that we had started our trek a bit too late in the day for the boys to really appreciate it without a nap and had to turn back around.)  When we were about twenty minutes into our trip we reached a place called Three Rivers and we were in awe at how charming this little nook of a town was hidden in the mountains.  It has the cutest little ice cream shop, antique stores, trails galore, and then- out of the corner of our eyes we spotted it- a Pizza Factory!  It was here too!

 

Many of you who know our family, or have been following the blog, know that we lost an incredible woman last summer.  She had a huge impact on not only my life but so many others.  She was my youth pastor, my mentor, my spiritual mom.  Her words of advice have not only run laps but marathons in my mind throughout each season of life and as I saw the pizza sign that day for one of my favorite teenage memories something she had once said came to life for me...

 

“God is bigger than [where you are now]”.

 

I have to say I teared up a bit and had a bit of difficulty swallowing due to the giant lump in my throat that had formed from hearing her voice yet again in my head.  Her loss hasn’t been easy and I think of her often.  But this piece of advice, this one I’m sharing with you today, holds special meaning.  It was one of the last ones she had left with me before leaving this earth and I hope it speaks volumes to you…

 

We had been visiting after my husband and I had moved to Stockton (about 4 years ago) and she was inquiring as to how we were liking things.  “We love it”, I remember saying.  “It’s not Roseville, but it’s exactly where we are supposed to be right now and I love it.” She started smiling and shared with me about how she herself and her husband had faced a similar transition early in their marriage.  They were moving from a town she had always known to a place she had only heard of.  “It was scary, but I realized afterward that God was bigger than Marysville.”  She had moved from a place where she had come to know God and realized that He was with her wherever she went.  And not only that, but He was already in that new place working on people before she had even gotten there.  He wasn’t tied down to a city or to a place, a camp or a church.  He was everywhere. 

 

He is in the small church down the street and the megachurch on the corner.  He is in the town of two hundred and the city of two million.  He is present as far as the eye can see and He is present in places our human minds will never be able to comprehend.  He is everywhere.

 

He isn’t your mom and pop hole in the wall coffee shop, He’s Starbucks, and He is everywhere.

 

So for my friends who are graduating, the ones facing big life changes, and the ones still undecided about what to do next- rest in this, God is bigger than where you are now.  You will see, just as I had when finding that Pizza Factory hidden in the side of a mountain, that God is not so small that He can only be contained to one place.  He is bigger.  You don’t need to worry if God will provide; He will.  You don’t need to worry about the right doors opening; they will.  You don’t need to worry whether or not you will make new friends, new memories; you will.  You don’t need to fear the future, any part of it, because God is bigger than where you are now.  Take a big breath and jump right in to the destiny God has for your life, just as a child in a swimming pool.  It may be scary at first because you’ve never done it before but don’t worry; your Father is already there.

Psalm 46:1

"God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble." NIV

Psalm 46:1

"God is our Refuge and Strength [mighty and impenetrable to temptation], a very present and well-proved help in trouble." AMP