Wednesday, November 7, 2012

What is this?!

On our last date night my husband took me to one of my favorite restaurants, Mimi's Cafe! They have an amazing brunch menu but I've never been for dinner and that's exactly when we went. As we looked through the menu I remember thinking I wanted one of everything but alas I settled on an old favorite- Chicken Marsala! We get our meals and they were fantastic, Rich looked down at his plate poking his food and asked "What is this creep made out of?... Oh, I mean this crap?" It took everything in me not to roll out of the booth from laughing so hard, "oh, you mean your CREPE?" I responded. It is safe to say that my husband is not a foodie, good thing he married me so he wouldn't really have to eat cr... I mean... Bad food!

I love to bake and I know exactly what you need to make a crepe, but even with Rich's lack of knowledge in this particular area it didn't keep him from enjoying his delicious food. Because he trusted that the cook did know and that was good enough for him, answers or not!

A couple weeks ago we surprisingly found out that we were expecting a third little blessing. It was a shock to say the least but we were excited nonetheless. Then it came time for my 8 week check up appointment. On Monday my doctor told me that she didn't see a baby. My body was pregnant she agreed but it could be a false pregnancy. My world was a little shaken by the news. She wanted to make sure and sent me for another appointment to the radiology office where an ultrasound showed a baby at 6 weeks (when my uterus was at 8 weeks) with no heartbeat. I would love to say I held it together, and I did until I got into my car. I sat there in the parking lot crying my eyes out, not just begging but pleading with the Lord to do something. My husband so graciously met me by the back door when I arrived home and let me weep in his arms while I tried to gather my thoughts.

One minute I am grieving the loss of a baby and the next my doctor calls to tell me that there is a small chance the baby could still be ok. What the what?! My bloodwork came back "positive" (whatever that means) and I had to set up an appointment for Monday to check to see if the baby has grown. I sit here a confused woman holding on to the glimmer of hope that this baby will be ok and I'm reminded of that date night. You see, I don't know why things happen or how things will turn out, but I trust the One who is working it all together. That's what Romans 8:28 says that He "WORKS all things for our good". Flour by itself is NOT good, baking powder would make you sick, but I trust that the One putting them all together knows just how to WORK them and add the necessary ingredients to make a delicious crepe.




This is not a sob story, it is a story I wanted to share with all of you I consider friends and family. And if you can take anything from it, I hope you will remember this... That you won't always get the answer you hope for, you won't always understand, but you will ALWAYS be looked after to take every rotten situation and work it for your benefit. So here I still sit.  Confused. Saddened. Hopeful. Saying the same thing that Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego did in Daniel chapter 3- My God will save me (come through for me , work a miracle for me) and even if He doesn't... I will still trust that this too will one day be worked for my good.  Keep trusting my friends.  He hasn't forgotten about me and He will surely not forget about you.
 
 
Proverbs 3:5
"Lean on, trust in, and be confident in the Lord with all your heart
and mind and do not rely on your own insight or understanding."

2 comments:

  1. Vanessa, it makes me so happy to claim you as my neice. What a gift you have received from God and what a gift from God you are to all who come in contact with you, either through this blog or in person. On a day that has seemed to be hopeless on different levels, you have brought hope to me through your strength and trust is God. I am praying for you and thank you for sharing. - Cheryll

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  2. Hi sweetie, I am praying and trusting God with you. Rachelle

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